Category Archives: Fitness

Reality Check

“We started this discussion because I signed off on a project that my team leader believes cannot be done,” Ryker explained. “We identified that, as a manager, I had some self doubt, that perhaps the ringleader might be right.”

I nodded.

“We determined that I had to deal with my own self doubt before I face the team leader,” Ryker continued. “We determined that only after I dealt with my own demons, could I make headway with the team.”

I nodded again. “And, to make headway with the team, what do you have to pay attention to?”

“I think I have to pay attention to the demons each team member has, including the demons the team leader has,” Ryker replied. “I think we have to have a reality check.”

I smiled. “We talked about awareness, we talked about preparation. You have added reality checking.
Reality checking is valuable, especially in the midst of doubt. But, people don’t like to reality check under pressure. So, when do you want to do this reality checking? Before the project gets started?  In the middle of the project when you are already behind schedule?  Or at the end of the project when you have missed the deadline?”

“I think we have to slay the dragon of self doubt first, before the project gets started,” Ryker said. “I know it will take some time, but if we tackle the project with the mindset of self doubt, we will struggle with the obstacles inside the project.”

“Sometimes we have to go slow, so later we can go fast.”

Which Dog Do You Feed?

“I have a dog that thinks, as a manager, that I am an imposter. And, I have a dog that believes I am NOT an imposter. I know which dog to feed. What do I feed the dog?” Ryker wanted to know.

“Attention,” I replied. “It’s not the food, it is the act of feeding. You get what you pay attention to.”

“Okay,” Ryker said. “But, I am still stumped.”

“Make a list. What does a manager do?” I asked. “A manager who is not an imposter?”

“You said awareness, that’s one,” Ryker had a start. “We have talked about preparedness. I have to prepare.”

“Prepare for what?”

“I have to prepare for anything, because I don’t know what obstacles there are,” Ryker concluded.

“And, how do you find the obstacles that are there?”

“I find them. I look for them. I aggressively go out in search of them, instead of waiting for them to appear.”

“And, why do you do that?” I smiled.

“Because I am not an imposter,” Ryker smiled back.

Beating the Status Quo

“Are you saying that my internal thinking, my doubts as a leader, seeing myself as an imposter, IF I can deal with all of that, the problems in the project will be easier?” Ryker was curious.

“No, the problems in the project will still be difficult,” I replied. “But, if you have doubts in yourself, the problems in the project may be impossible. Slay the imposter first.”

“Slaying the imposter sounds easy and impossible at the same time. Do I just ignore the imposter, pretend it doesn’t exist?” Ryker asked.

“The first step is awareness,” I nodded. “And you are aware. Your stomach relays the message loud and clear. Your stomach wants to win. It tells you to just go with the flow. You have been drifting along in life allowing your stomach to make the tough decisions, mostly to stick with the status quo, do not tackle anything difficult. It wants to lull you back into familiar patterns where there is no conflict.”

“But, the conflict is still there,” Ryker reminded me.

“Yes,” I continued to nod. “Which will win. It’s like two dogs in a fight. Which will win?”

Ryker knew this story. “The dog that wins is the dog I feed.”

Resistance is Inside

“You told me to listen to my stomach,” Ryker said. “My stomach tells me there is trouble ahead for this project. At least, now I know the trouble is inside me and not in someone else.”

“The stomach is a valuable radar detector if we will only listen,” I replied. “When we blame the resistance on someone else like your team’s ringleader, our stomach is happy, it does not tell us that we are the ones that have to change.”

“And, that suited me just fine. I could put all of the project pain on someone else.”

“Resistance is very real. It keeps us in the status quo, where it is comfortable. Resistance must be wrestled with before any real progress is made. So, tell me what you are going to do? How will you fight the resistance?”

The Resistance

Ryker was deep in thought about his doubts to lead his team in a difficult project. “I see the resistance in my team’s ringleader, but the real resistance is in my own mindset.”

“Even though you signed off on the contract. Even though you promised the customer, face-to-face. Those do not erase your own self-doubt,” I said. “Moreover, you think it is easier to change the mindset of your ringleader than it is to change your own.”

“I was so focused on the resistance from outside,” Ryker replied, “that I couldn’t even see my own resistance.”

“And, until you slay that dragon, your leadership on the project will be full of second-guessing, squandered preparation and halted momentum.”

Dungeons, Dragons and Demons

“If I could change the mindset of the ringleader, I could change the mindset of the team,” Ryker thought out loud. “She does not believe we can be successful in the project. It’s a limiting belief in herself.”

“So, she has an internal demon that prevents her from signing on to the project? The very same project that you already promised the customer?” I asked.

“I’m not going back to the customer to renegotiate my commitment,” Ryker was adamant.

“So, let’s talk about internal demons that reside in the mind of your ringleader,” I nodded. “But, before that, let’s talk about the internal demons you have to face.”

“What do you mean?” Ryker was puzzled. “I am not the one confused here. I already signed the contract. I’m fully committed.”

“Yes, but you have doubts,” I smiled. “You are the manager of the team, but you feel it’s important to change the ringleader’s mindset about the project. You feel that not doing so will jeopardize the success of the project. You have doubts about your own leadership ability in the face of the team. You have your own demons to slay. Who is the real leader of your team?”

This put an abrupt halt in the flow of the discussion. Ryker was thinking. “You are right. I do not see myself with the power to pull this off. I mean, I have the authority, but the team has the power.”

“And, what is it about yourself that makes you think this way?” I wanted to know. More accurately, I wanted Ryker to know. “You suggest that changing the mindset of the team’s ringleader has more impact on the team than changing your own mindset. What is the demon that you have to slay?”

Comfort Zone

“But, the ringleader of the team doesn’t believe in the project. As long as that is what she believes, the project is doomed,” Ryker explained.

“What are your alternatives?” I asked. “And, I am looking for more than one.”

Ryker thought a bit. “I could try to change what she believes. That’s one. I could try to change her influence over the team, find a new ringleader. Or, it might just be easier to resign the project, let it go.”

I nodded. “Yes, it would be easier to abandon the project, stay in your comfort zone.”

Ryker pursed his lips. Seconds ticked by. “Nope, not going to abandon.”

“Okay, then,” I stared at Ryker. “Then, tell me what you are going to do.”

Difficult Work

“It looks like you have a fly in the ointment,” I said.

“You got that right,” Ryker replied. “We have a difficult project ahead, and one of the ringleaders on the team says it can’t be done.”

“How so?” I wanted to know.

“She has reasons that sound plausible. The work is too difficult, it will take longer than the deadline and the client is too difficult to work with,” he shook his head.

“I believe she is right,” I responded. “For her, the work is too difficult, she is not organized enough to meet the deadline and she doesn’t believe in the outcome the way your client believes. It can’t be done, by her.”

“But, I signed on to the project, because I believe it can be done,” Ryker stopped, then started again. “The work is difficult, we may have to learn some new methods. The deadline is tight, we might have to spend time to organize a solid plan. But more than that, I believe, like the client, that it can be done.”

“So, what is the difference between you and the team’s ringleader?” I asked.

“It’s obvious,” he shook his head. “I believe and she doesn’t. It’s a mental state.”

“But, mental state is not enough. To be successful in this project, you are going to have to learn some new methods and be organized. Not enough to think positive, you have to prepare. But, you won’t prepare unless you believe the project can be done.”

Positive Attitude is Not Enough

I’ve been watching a lot of hockey lately. Disclosure, I am rooting for the Florida Panthers. I noticed a commercial pitting the heart and determination of any hypothetical hockey team approaching a game with its opponent. The message was that every player on both teams had the same dreams, the same exhilaration, the same passion to win. The commercial ends with a cliffhanger encouraging you to watch the game.

The commercial admits that we often think the team with the most heart will win, that positivity will triumph. I assume most people wake up every day with the full intention to do their best. There will still be winners and losers. Mental determination is not enough. It is competence that determines the difference. Competence is the combination of capability and technical knowledge, coupled with practiced performance. That will determine who wins the Stanley Cup.

Prepare for Intensity

“These are three problems I see with the plan,” Stephan shared.

“Problems with the plan, or obstacles to face in the plan?” I asked.

“Obstacles, three big obstacles that will be tough to overcome,” he nodded. “But we have a mitigation strategy to work over, around or through, so I think we are under control.”

“What about the obstacles that are not part of your plan?” I pressed.

“I am sure there will be some hiccups,” Stephan agreed. “Something will happen that we don’t anticipate, something that we can’t prepare for.”

Can’t prepare, or won’t prepare?” I replied.

“If we don’t know what it is, how can we prepare for it?” he wanted to know.

“We can mentally prepare, prepare for an increased pace, a practiced quality triage, improvisation of method. We may not know the real obstacles that lay ahead, but we can prepare with mental fitness.  Because, yes, there will be unanticipated problems.”