Tag Archives: learning

Gratitude for Past Mistakes

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“You look happy this morning,” I said.

“Indeed,” Amira replied. “It’s a new year. We get a clean slate. Our mistakes are in the past. We can go forward with a renewed sense of optimism.”

“But didn’t the past deliver you here, to where you are today? Didn’t the mistakes you made teach you lessons not to repeat? Didn’t the struggles you had with the problems you solved put you a step ahead in the grand scheme?”

Amira paused her thinking. “But that was in the past. Can’t we forget and move forward?”

I shook my head. “No, we cannot forget. More important, those things in the past were great teachers if we listen. Tell me, Amira, if you really look back, what are you grateful for? What happened to land you in this place of optimism today? Yes, it’s a fresh start, but built on a platform of gratitude for the part of the journey we have already completed. What are you grateful for?”

Learned From a Book

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“You know I took three courses in leadership to prepare me for this role,” Rosalyn reminded me. “The company believed in me, committed the tuition to attend, allowed me time off work. I feel like I have let them down.”

“Indeed, you thought you had finished your preparation when you got your certificate from that last program,” I smiled. “But, that was just the beginning. I am also certain there are 20 books on leadership in your library, some for show, some dogeared, full of underlines and highlights.”

“You recommended some of those books,” she protested.

“Yes, I did,” I said in agreement. “But no concert pianist learned to play the piano by reading a book. No elite basketball player learned how to drill a 3-pointer by watching a video. Leadership is a learned sport in the school of experience.”

It’s the Golfer, Not the Clubs

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“So, you have the best tools, the best machinery that money can buy?” I asked.

“Yes,” Rolo replied. “The very best.”

“And, yet your team still underperforms?” I continued.

“Yes, and we purchase the best in raw materials of highest quality, minimum defects,” Rolo nodded.

“And, yet your team still underperforms?” I asked again. “And, your training. I assume you have the best in training?”

“Of course,” he agreed. “I mean, it’s not like we don’t run into production problems, but when we do, it shuts down the line, everything stops while we figure out the problem. Seems odd that it takes so long because we have a best practice for almost every problem that occurs. We are supposed to know what to do.”

“So, what’s the problem?” I wanted to know.

“I don’t know,” Rolo shook his head. “We have invested in the best of everything for our people.”

“What if you don’t have the right people,” I looked at Rolo squarely. “How do you invest on getting the right people?”

But, I Know the Answer

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“Yes, we have this meeting, once a week, where I get the team together to ask me questions,” Eliana explained. “We bring in pizza, I call it Lunch and Learn.”

“Learning is good,” I nodded. “In that session, what are you learning?”

“I don’t think you understand,” she replied. “They are the ones with questions. I am providing the answers. I am not the one in the meeting who is learning.”

“I think I get that,” I smiled. “They have questions and you know stuff. They come to learn, in learning mode. You stand at the front, in knowing mode.”

“Of course,” Eliana flatly stated. “They are young and I have more experience.”

“But, my question was – what are YOU learning?” I asked. “More importantly, when you are in knowing mode, what are you NOT learning?”

“But, shouldn’t I share my experience of what I know?” Eliana pressed.

“The purpose of experience, or expertise, is not to demonstrate your knowledge (knowing mode). The purpose of experience is sharpen your mind to ask better questions (learning mode). Better questions that lead the team to mission, vision and purpose.”

The Purpose for Problems

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“I’m stumped,” Felipe groaned. “And, the worst part, I feel bad.”

“How so?” I asked.

“I’ve been struggling with this problem for more than two weeks, without resolution. And, it’s painful. I should be able to figure it out, but the problem persists. At first, I thought it was just a bump in the road, something we could fix. Then, I thought perhaps it was a fundamental assumption that we just got wrong.”

“And, now?” I prodded.

Felipe took a deep breath. “And, now? Now I feel like a failure. That maybe it’s me. That I am not cut out for this work. I was proud to get this promotion. I felt important. I barked instructions and people paid attention. Now, I just don’t know. Maybe I am an imposter?”

“We all encounter problems,” I replied. “Sometimes those problems are to be solved. Some problems can be eliminated. But, the real purpose for problems is to learn something new. What is this problem trying to teach you?”

Competence and Happiness

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“A new day, a new way?” I asked.

Sophia smirked. “Yes, but this is more difficult than I thought. I mean, I thought I would like this kind of work, I thought I would be good at it.”

“Conventional wisdom,” I said. “Isn’t that the pursuit of happiness? Find something you like and you will be good at it.”

“Don’t get me wrong, I like the work, it’s interesting, but it doesn’t seem to come natural to me,” she said, shaking her head.

“It is possible you have it backwards,” I nodded. “We like activity in which we are competent, not the other way around. Just because you like something doesn’t mean you are competent. Just because you are interested and read a book about basketball does not mean you are a good 3-point shooter. On your way to becoming a good 3-point shooter, which takes practice over practice, as you become competent, you will find your happiness. Those who are competent in their pursuit will find the most satisfaction. Those who are not competent, who did not practice, will soon become disinterested and go another way.”

Most Important Variable

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“But, shouldn’t we start with the great management books in the literature?” Leonard questioned. “I mean the great management books, not the mediocre, not the lousy ones. Those people have tried and failed, tried again and finally succeeded. Shouldn’t I pay attention to how they did it?”

“How they did it, might be instructive,” I replied. “IF you were in those exact circumstances, at that exact time and IF you were who they were. But you’re not. You expect all things to be equal. Your circumstances are different, your time is different. Most importantly, YOU are different. The cogent variable is not the step-by-step instructions. The most important variable is YOU.”

The Way It Works

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“So you are not so high on reading books about leadership?” Leonard pushed back. “You read books on leadership. Are you saying that I shouldn’t listen to you. After all, you are the teacher.”

I smiled. “Yes, I read books. And, you choose whether to listen to me or not, it’s your choice. I know for a fact that I cannot teach leadership or management. It doesn’t happen that way. I also know, for a fact, that leadership or management can be learned. That’s the way it works.”

Do What Is Expected

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Gillian had a smile on her face. “I think I finally have the right team. Everything is working smoothly. And every team member has the competence to do what it is expected. What more could I want?”

“Dangerous to ask me an open-ended question,” I replied. “Do you feel prepared? Do they have the skills? Not to do what is expected, but to grapple with the unexpected?”

What the Goal Doesn’t Tell

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“But, can’t we celebrate for just a moment? It has been a good year,” Yolanda was insistent.

“Yes, indeed. Celebrate the moment. And, there were good moments. But, what does that tell you about the future? Achieving this year’s goal tells you the mark in relation to your forecast, which was created a year ago. Where is your current journey and where are you along that path? Achieving your goal in relation to a forecast doesn’t tell you what went wrong that you can learn from. Achieving your goal doesn’t tell you where you could be if you had taken a different path. Achieving your goal doesn’t tell you about the preparations you took, the capacity your team developed, or didn’t develop.  It doesn’t tell you how good your competitors are, what the market was like or if you have the right people.  It doesn’t tell you who, on your team, has potential.  It’s fine to have the goal as a mark, but focus on the things that drive the goal.  Those are the rich moments in your journey.”