Every conversation can be calibrated. Every conversation has a platform. Seven levels of listening –

1. Ignoring completely, oblivious, engrossed in your smartphone.
2. Pretending to listen, glancing up from your smartphone.
3. Listening selectively, attentive only during downloads on your smartphone.
4. Listening to respond, smartphone holstered.
5. Listening to understand, to understand the other person, to understand the situation.
6. Listening to learn, to learn something new, something interesting, something that matters.
7. Listening for the intersection where someone else’s experience meets our experience on which we can build trust.

Thinking about your relationships, as a manager, as a friend, as a stranger, as a parent. Where is your intersection with reality?