Not a Matter of Talking

When I get a phone call for help, before a word is spoken, I can lay money on one of three reasons.

  1. Someone needs help with Time Management.
  2. Someone has a personality conflict with someone else.
  3. There has been a breakdown in communication that needs fixing.

And that’s how my day begins.

We experience breakdowns in communication for a whole host of reasons.

  • Difference in gender.
  • Difference in experience.
  • Difference in agenda.
  • Difference in education.
  • Difference in priorities.
  • Difference in culture.
  • Difference in values.
  • Difference in (you fill in the blank).

I don’t know if you detect a common theme.

The problem is NOT a breakdown in communication. That is only the symptom, the smokescreen that ignores the difference between two people.

To solve this problem, most people conduct a communications intervention, to examine the methods of communication to see where the problem is.

Methods of Communication

  • Speaking
  • Writing
  • Reading

You will never resolve a breakdown in communication using any of these methods, because the problem is not communication. The problem is the difference between people. This difference can only be resolved by the communication method we seldom think about, seldom practice. Only resolved by listening.

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