Fear of Confrontation

Managers contribute to underperformance by avoiding the issue. Managers hope. I am here to tell you there is no hope. There is only the conversation.

In our Working Leadership Online program, I asked a participant to describe the benefit of the Field Work related to accountability.

“Getting over the fear of having the conversation. I was scared it would spiral out of control. The meeting went nothing like I anticipated.”

We provide a proven model to deal with underperformance, but the biggest obstacle is still the fear of confrontation. Our model not only addresses the underperformance, but also the fear on the part of the manager. Here are the essential steps.

  • Describe the behavior (underperformance) you observed, as a manager.
  • Describe the impact of the behavior.
  • Describe the implications of what will happen if nothing changes.
  • Describe your contribution to the underperformance, as a manager. (Yes, as a manager, you are part of the problem.)
  • Describe the ideal outcome.
  • Ask for an action plan.
  • Listen.

Except for the last step, this is a monologue, lasting less than 60 seconds. There are some other ground rules, but this is the core. Now, check your fear at the door.

One thought on “Fear of Confrontation

  1. Thad Greer

    I couldn’t agree with you more. The conversations you anticipate to be the most uncomfortable are the ones you need to have the most!

    Reply

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