“Why are you avoiding this conversation with Curtis?” I asked.
“I know I should talk to him, but I just don’t like confrontation. His production is below par. I don’t think he is doing his best. But if I talk to him, he might get upset and his production might get slower,” Lauren explained.
“How do you define confrontation?”
“Curtis screws up and I call him on it.”
“And?”
“And he will try to defend himself with excuses. I will have to argue with his excuses. I will have to force my reasons against his excuses. I just want to avoid it,” she protested.
“What if you changed your definition of confrontation to a search for the truth. Instead of excuses, let’s find out what the real problem is and see if Curtis can fix it?” I suggested.
Sometimes, the way we understand a single word can change the way we see what we do. Many people avoid confrontation because it brings uncomfortable images. If we can see confrontation as a search for the truth, we can have the conversation with a more productive purpose.
Communication is the key, have you clearly explained your expectations and reinforced your expectations through communications
What is being described is one of the seven symptoms of a silent problem (a problem that is being avoided, neglected or going about unnoticed)- from book Without Warning. I therefore raise that yes it is a communication issue, but it could also spell something deeper. For instance: “When the risk of making a decision for employees is considered to be greater than making one. Symptom; Slow and indecisive decision making.
Look deeper, and you may find the problem.
Amen to this article. We definitely need to change our perception of confrontation and adjust our strategy. Praise for the good things that person does and what areas you would like them to improve on. That’s not a confrontation but it does call that person out without he or she being completely destroyed by the news they are probably well aware of but will continue to do ‘just ok’ since they have no incentive to think they can be bothered with getting better.