“So, what’s the difference between motivation and manipulation?” I asked.
“My kid is in the back seat of the car, and I ask him to put on his seat belt. I tell him that if he puts it on, we will go get ice cream as a reward.
“What is it? Motivation or manipulation?” The class sits on the question. Several want to leap out of their chairs with the answer, but they know it will make them a target for the discussion.
“My kid is in the back seat of the car, and I ask him to put on his seat belt. I tell him that if he doesn’t put it on, he won’t be able to play on the computer tonight.
“What is it? Motivation or manipulation?”-TF
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Our next Leadership class in Fort Lauderdale kicks off November 7, 2007. For more information, visit www.workingleadership.com.
Reward is used in the first one to achieve results and fear in the second. Both are manipulators. May be used once, twice but not always.
Motivation comes from understanding. For that you need to tell the child why a seatbelt is important and this discussion could probably be over an icecream.
Ahh, the wisdom of a father. Servant leadership is a theory a person can study and follow. I would like to see leadership based on fatherhood and motherhood and brotherhood and sisterhood. I think it may be a winner.
JQ
Harpreet,
Do you like vanilla or chocolate?
So, JQ, you probably aren’t going to like my suggestion of managers wearing sidearms in the workplace?
This first is motivation. You’re rewarding for correct behavior. The second is manipulation. You’re punishing for not behaving correctly. Both may work for a little while but true behavior change comes from within. To help that develop in a person takes a lot of close interaction and a demonstration of those values by you – the manager or parent.