Like I Am Not Even There

“She ignores me, like I am not even there,” Joan complained, “and I am her boss.” Joan joined the company as a manager nine months ago. One of her direct reports was a 12 year veteran with the company.

“What is the behavior you observe?” I asked.

“I call a meeting of my staff, she doesn’t show. I walk past her in the hallway and she doesn’t acknowledge me. She is focus forward. I have seen personality conflicts before, but this one takes the cake.”

“How do you think you will gain her respect?”

Joan shook her head. “I just want her to be nice. At this point, I have about given up on respect.”

I waited for the pity party to settle for a few seconds. “First, this is not a personality conflict. Second, I don’t care if she is nice to you, I just want her respect.”

“Yeah, right, how is that going to happen?”

“It is really very simple. All you have to do is bring value to her thinking and her work. Stimulate her thinking. Help her improve to the next level. You cannot gain respect by giving directives or demanding that she be a nice person. You can only gain respect by bringing value.” -TF

One thought on “Like I Am Not Even There

  1. kurt

    I find it very remarkeble that there are still some managers on this earth that think that they earn respect because their the boss!!! What happened to earning some respect? At my experience: start with giving some respect and attention.

    Reply

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