“But, what if my team just doesn’t want to listen to me?” Susan protested.
“And, how does that make you, as the manager, less responsible for the communication?” I asked.
“Yeah, but, if they don’t want to listen, how can I make them listen?”
“Indeed, how can you make them listen?”
Susan stopped, this wasn’t going anywhere. “I can’t make them listen. If they don’t want to listen, I have to figure out how to get them to want to listen.”
“That’s a start. Remember, as the manager, you are 100 percent responsible for the communication. So, how do you get them to listen in the first place?”
“Well, I guess I have to talk about things they are interested in. I have to get their attention.”
“And since you are 100 percent responsible for the communication, that is exactly where you should start. Speak in terms of the other person’s interests.”
Determining relevance and the Values of the other person is the only way to add value to the other persons work. This can shift the perspective from against-them to with-them. The manager being 100% responsible for the communication sound daunting, and correct.
Try finding a solution instead of dwelling on the problem, this is what makes management a success. Repeating the problem only makes it seem daunting.
Often its not because people arn’t listening, its because the manager isn’t listening and this can be due to the manager telling rather than asking questions. Try moving from being the conversation to facilitating a conversation – when other talk and the manager listens, both the problem and solution can be explored