From the Ask Tom mailbag –
Question
I don’t know how to gain their respect. Sometime in the meeting, it’s as if they are not even listening to me. They nod and agree, promise to follow through. The next day, they are back to the same non-productive behavior. They don’t even respect the meeting. They show up late, sometimes not at all. Where are their priorities?
Response
Rodney lives on in the lives of many managers. Expecting respect, demanding respect didn’t work for Mr. Dangerfield and doesn’t work for most managers.
You will never gain respect until you, as their manager, bring value to their problem solving and decision making.
Stop thinking about yourself, start thinking about your team. If you, as a manager, want to bring value to the thinking and work of your team members, start by asking questions. Through questions, you can help them clarify, explore, challenge, plan and follow-up.
In my years in the classroom, I found that no one really listens to me, anyway. So, I stopped lecturing and started asking questions. Something happened. My students started to learn from themselves.
Start. Start asking questions that bring value to the problem solving and decision making of your team. Rodney will rest in peace.
Oh, if you are not getting the response you want, you are asking the wrong question. Happy New Year!
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Hiring Talent 2019 (our interactive hiring program) is scheduled for release, Mon, Jan 7, 2019.