“So, your bully has to change?” I continued.

“Yes. You have talked about necessity in the workplace,” Miriam replied. “This change is necessary for her to continue to be a member of my team.”

“But, can people really change?” I challenged. “You know, we are not psychologists or social workers.” I was testing Miriam’s resolve.

“You are right, I am not a psychologist. I am a manager. It is not my job to make her change. I can make her aware of the problem. I can create an environment where she can make the change. I can check-in with her about her progress, but you are right, the responsibility for change is hers.

“In the end, I am the manager. It is up to me to determine what behavior is necessary for a person to be a member of my team.”

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Our next Leadership Program in Fort Lauderdale begins February 26, 2007. Visit www.workingleadership.com.